*~*

Despite my struggle in recent years to decide where I really want to be in the community of faith, I still consider myself Catholic. I'm not sure what it's going to take to change that, but I wouldn't be surprised if it did change. But not yet. I don't agree with a lot of things that the church says and does, but in the same way that I don't disown my parents just because they haven't always been the parents I wanted them to be, I'm not ditching the Catholic part of my identity just because Mama Church makes mistakes and says stoopid things sometimes.

*~*

So yeah. Still Catholic, even if I'm not a particularly good Catholic and even if I go to a Methodist church more often than my Catholic one.

I'm not mourning the Pope. I understand where people are coming from with the mourning thing, he was a comforting presence to a lot of people and now he's gone. And now they're unsure about who's going to take his place. But that, to me, is not worth focusing on right now. Rather, it seems to me that this is about the greatest thing that could ever happen to a Pope. He's gone home. His work here is done. He's stopped becoming and now he is. He's awakened from his dream. Doesn't any of this ring a bell? This is what we Catholics are told is the be-all, end-all. This is what we study and prepare for. He's graduated. Why would you mourn that?

*~*

Maybe I'm fooling myself, but in theory at least, I feel the same way about my own eventual death. I don't want people to mourn when I die�I want them to throw a big party and say things like, "Yeah! Ellen never has to sit in Beltway traffic again-- lucky dawg!"

If we have any power to communicate with our loved ones after we die, I will make all of mine want to turn up their stereos really loud and dance.

*~*